Meet Brooke Benjamin

Brooke is a Chicago-born Funeral Director and Celebrant with twenty-five years of experience. Now, finally, a business owner! She exists to serve others and finds people endlessly, boundlessly fascinating. Brooke is a strong communicator, writer, and resourceful builder of bridges. Her offerings include burials, funerals, cremations, celebrations of lives, pet services, dispositions, merchandise, and direction of services with plenty of green options. Beyond disposition of human remains, she believes that the law, spiritual/religious imperatives, and the path a family chooses should promote, rather than preclude, healing and also promote an individual’s memory. If we can help bridge the gap between humanity and the divine, fantastic. She believes when we talk about death, we talk about life. 

Q+A

What do you know for sure?

We are all electricity and chemicals, and chemicals are portals. Nobody gets out alive. There has to be more than this. Just because someone has been allowed the privilege of aging, doesn't mean they were good parents. If you don't laugh, you will cry. It's over in a flash, life is impossibly short. Some people do not know how to save themselves, and you cannot save them or go all the way down with a sinking ship, or it's two lives lost. Regular massage is a part of basic healthcare. We The People do a lousy job of taking care of our elderly, our infirm, and our addicted. Humans are sometimes really selfish and cruel and put pain and torment upon what they perceive as "other". We are all in it together. A little humility goes a long way. So does a little lipstick. 

If you had to change careers, what would you want to do?

Stylist or boutique owner catering to high-end fashion-forward courtesans. There's nothing more exciting than the right person in the right garment.

Tell us about your creative process.

People do the work of living their lives, upon which I report. Whether it's a death announcement or writing/presenting a memorial service that doesn't sound like everyone else's, I like to say that "the thing wrote itself." I struggled greatly as a younger person to write about anything, and this was in journalism school! I agonized over word choice. It's so much easier, now that the end-game is clear: to help people feel, and to assure them that their dead relative's life had meaning and purpose. I love when connections between known facts of a person's journey (or their philosophy) and a piece of music or poetry or art reveal themselves. 

What do you do when you feel stuck?

I ride it out. I have a lot of faith that as agonizingly hollow as something may feel, it will always come around to being equally good. That pendulum swings. With patience and faith, it will come around again.  But I also like massages and sleeping and rock'n'roll and hiking and new environments and gettin' busy and listening to music and the occasional cheap thrill. Whatever adjusts one's chemicals. Maybe it's standing in a bright light for a few minutes. Whatever depression or dysthymia I've ever experienced is a God-shaped hole in the heart, so I may or may not have ever begged to whatever is up there for help or courage. I'm incredibly grateful for my life and privilege.

What made you cry this year?

My aging decrepit parents. Well one is up and running just fine, but the other is really struggling and fighting and not making it easy for their helpers. I've come to some conclusions about this parent's life journey, and it makes me sad, especially seeing the sacrifices the other has made. This whole experience gives me empathy for all the families with whom I've met over the years. You can imagine, but you don't know until you know, just how challenging and confusing it can be, navigating the care system. Social workers have all of my respect.

Want more? Visit her website: www.InclusiveFuneralCare.com and follow Inclusive Funeral Care on Facebook.